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What do you call a lawyer with an IQ of 50?
Your Honor.

What do you throw to a drowning lawyer?
His partners.

What does a lawyer use for birth-control?
His personality.

What happens when you cross a pig with a lawyer?
Nothing. There are some things even a pig won't do.

What's the difference between a lawyer and a vulture?
The lawyer gets frequent flyer miles.

What's another difference between a lawyer and a vulture?
Removable wingtips.

What's the difference between God and a lawyer?
God doesn't think he's a lawyer.

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