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Last year I upgraded from Girlfriend 7.0 to Wife 1.0
and noticed that the new program began unexpected
child processing that took up a lot of space and
valuable resources. No mention of this phenomenon
was included in the product brochure. In addition, Wife
1.0 installs itself into all other programs and launches
during system initialization, where it monitors all other
system activity.

Applications such as Poker Night 10.3, Boys' Night
2.5 and Sunday Football 5.0 no longer run, crashing
the system whenever they are selected. I cannot seem
to keep Wife 1.0 in the background while attempting to
run some of my other favorite applications. I am
thinking about going back to Girlfriend 7.0, but the
un-install does not work on this program. Can you help
me, please?! Thanks, Joe

Dear Joe,
This is a very common problem men complain about
but is mostly due to a primary misconception.
Many people upgrade from Girlfriend 7.0 to Wife 1.0
with the idea that Wife 1.0 is merely a UTILITIES &
ENTERTAINMENT program. Wife 1.0 is an
OPERATING SYSTEM and designed by its creator
to run everything. It is unlikely you would be able to
purge Wife 1.0 and still convert back to Girlfriend 7.0.
Hidden operating files within your system would cause
Girlfriend 7.0 to emulate Wife 1.0 so nothing is gained.
It is impossible to uninstall, delete, or purge the
program files from the system once installed.

You cannot go back to Girlfriend 7.0 because Wife
1.0 is not designed to do this. Some have tried to install
Girlfriend 8.0 or Wife 2.0 but end up with more
problems than the original system. Look in your manual
under 'Warnings - Alimony/Child Support.' I
recommend you keep Wife 1.0 and just deal with the
situation.
Having Wife 1.0 installed myself, I might also suggest
you read the entire section regarding General
Partnership Faults (GPFs). You must assume all
responsibility for faults and problems that might occur,
regardless of their cause.

The best course of action will be to enter the command
C:\APOLOGISE. In any case, avoid excessive use of
the ESC key because ultimately you will have to give
the APOLOGISE command before the operating
system will return to normal. The system will run
smoothly as long as you take the blame for all the
GPFs. Wife 1.0 is a great program, but very high
maintenance.

Consider buying additional software to improve the
performance of Wife 1.0. I recommend Flowers 2.1
and Chocolates 5.0. Do not, under any circumstances,
install Secretary With Short Skirt 3.3. This is not a
supported application for Wife 1.0 and is likely to
cause irreversible damage to the operating system.

Best of Luck.

Tech Support Matt Smith

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